The Original Pink Floyd Tour Of London

Scraping The Barrel

And to prolong the sense of torture, I round off with an entirely self-indulgent look back at the best of what I never used. Well, if Pink Floyd themselves want to keep their out-takes locked away, I'll inflict mine upon the planet instead. I have little doubt that some of the material here is actually superior to that which eventually found its way to the proper pages. But my judgement has never been particularly good. This hitherto unseen shot of Abbey Road rather proves it.


It's got nothing to do with Pink Floyd, but this picture of the Albert Memorial, opposite the Royal Albert Hall, is not only further proof of my contention above, but also goes to show just how spoiled old Albert was. Bloody great hall and a big monument too. And people think the Royal Family of today are expensive...

On the subject of big pointy things, it might not be realised that in my picture of Alexandra Palace, the television mast can't clearly be seen because some inconsiderate sod put a tree in my way. Luckily I took a shot from another angle which although slightly crooked, shows the mast but relegates the trees to mere black bits with no detail whatsoever. Serves them right. And yes, I was temporarily struck blind as a result of shooting into the sun. So don't do it kids, especially if you're desperate for the toilet at roughly the same time and want to find your way to some conveniences like I did, tried to and failed, just going behind a bush which didn't provide as much cover as I or the parents of nearby children would have liked...

Fortunately I had no such problems at Crystal Palace - if you discount hours of travelling, getting off the train at the wrong station and turning up on the day they decide to hold 2002's first concert of the year, thus meaning there was no access to the Bowl unless you bought a ticket.  Still, it allowed me time instead to develop nausea looking up at this big bastard, which just happens to be Alexandra Palace's successor.....

very very tall

Whilst on Hungerford Brigde, I took the picture of the Royal Festival Hall. But this, also taken from the bridge, shows it up for the concrete monstrosity it is. Pray silence for the city of London itself. In fact, it's a shame you can't see this at full size. There's loads of landmarks to spot.

This one is a classic example of being better (or more visible) than the very first shot of Battersea I used on the site, which has long since gone anyway. I have no idea why it lost out in the first place. Despite appearances, it was a fairly hazardous shot to take. Although I'm on the pavement, a fire engine was coasting along it too. Nearly ran me over. But on the face of it, at least they'd have had the necessary equipment on board to untangle me from the wreckage. So it could have been worse. Marginally.

Having travelled to the site of the Paris Theatre by means of a particularly joyful bus ride (as bus rides go; they didn't even check my ticket, so I could have got away with fare dodging), I should have known that a pall would descend on the day's future prospects thereafter. And so it proved, when this sight greeted me. I went round the back too, but found to my dismay that even an out of focus shot of scaffolding and plastic sheeting far surpassed the rear of the building and its lack of visual delights.

Again, this alternative shot of the old EMI HQ in Manchester Square should really have made it to the main selection. But it unaccountably didn't. Sorry.

Now here's a thing. According to a recently broadcast programme here in the UK, Floyd's early shows at Powis Gardens did take place at the church hall, but for unknown reasons they showed a shot of All Saints' Church instead of the Hall. Just as well I played safe on the day and took a picture of the church too. Now was I leaning, or is the church subsiding badly? I can't decide.

Ever wanted to know what Britannia Row's neighbours' place looks like? Of course not. That's why I'm wasting precious seconds of your life showing you.

Well...that's what I originally thought. But apparently that IS Britannia Row Studios, not that white thing next door. That whitish rectangle on the bottom left is a lump of stone which says it was the church hall. Nowadays it also sports a Britannia Row logo too. So once again, many apologies. I know, hanging's too good for me.


This is one of the many entrances to the Cromwell Road subway. You have no idea how many minutes I had to wait on those stairs for a relatively clear gap in the pedestrian traffic. On reflecton, I have no idea why I bothered with the picture in the first place.

Despite being looked at by workers of the Wembley complex in a way which spoke such words as "You tosser!" when I took this, I'm glad I did. For the twin towers of Wembley Stadium are to be turned to dust, as and when they can decide what to put in its place.

Whilst lurking with intent to photograph the London Arena, I came across this particularly appropriate daubing on the side of a pillar belonging to a nearby building occupied by the gigantic telecommunications company, BT.

You might remember me saying that I found some baffling graffiti along the side of the Rainbow Theatre; imagine my elation when I revisited  earlier this year and found that nobody had cleaned it off!

diddy really have a dog?

Sensing I was on to a good thing with mindless vandalism, I kept my eyes open for more of it - and I wasn't disappointed. Now, dear reader: let me ask this of you. Under what circumstances would anybody wish to a) liberate faecal matter and b) then advertise such sentiments on the surface of a public highway? (Yes, I know what you're thinking - "And what kind of arsehole then puts it on a website?")


For a while it seemed that anti-social and scatalogical behavior via the medium of spray paint would be the apex; but as with so much human development over the aeons, things are rarely cast in stone - mainly because freshly-laid concrete's more useful if you can find  it.

cast in stone?

You'd never believe it if I said that I found this as a result of appropriately taking a wrong turning and losing my way, would you? Incidentally, that hideous shadow wearing a stupid hat and inexplicably holding a digital camera up to his eye despite the LCD monitor facility banishing the need for such manouvres is indeed your genial host. Hello!

the filth and fury

Well, it's not remotely amusing in the slightest (much like the rest of this affair), but one has to wonder at some things. I presume it was put up for the benefit of non-Londoner construction workers and the like, and comes under the category of "Better safe than sorry."

Well, they might not own Animals...

In the badlands of Bermondsey, one is never entirely unaware of the fact that efforts have been made to clean up previously unattractive or neglected neighbourhoods in order to give the people who live there a better quality of life. Just occasionally though, you get the impression that they're pissing in the wind somewhat. Well, would you feel safe on a road with a name like that?

in the 'hood

Oh, come on. Are you *really* that surprised I was unable to hold the camera steady? This amusingly named restaurant is just a bit beyond the other side of the road to Chelsea Old Town Hall where, coincidentally enough, a certain phat phuc we all know and love held his 50th birthday party. I wonder if they'll give me a free meal in return for the advertising I'm giving them, eh?

Obviously they arrived far too early for the show, or an unforeseen technical hitch delayed the entry to the building - and what better way to fill in the time and commit an act of malicious vandalism by scribing their spleen into the aluminium outer walls of the London Arena? Shame about the scriber who couldn't distinguish 'too' from 'to', though. Maybe they let him in before he could finish off the last 'o'. Nowadays of course, what with the Arena's closure and planned demolition, the sentiment could just as easily be echoed in those desperate to gain access to the wall of fame with Pink Floyd's handprints before it's too late...

As one finishes gazing at Alexandra Palace and makes their way back down the hill towards the railway station, what at first appears to be a perfectly innocuous road sign on the way up becomes (thanks to some slack-bowelled moaner) a monument to diahorrea on the way down...

At one end of Abbey Road lives the famous studios. At the other end however, is situated a dreadful housing estate which is a masterpiece of concrete terrorism. Even the people who live there want to wash away the stain of association - or so I imagine, if this otherwise inexplicable (albeit well-executed) home-made advert for a popular brand of laundry detergent's anything to go by...

The old ones are the best. So.....I know I'm not the sharpest fork in the toolbox. But am I missing something here?

Still, there's nothing like concise, well-designed and informative signs for sightseers - and thanks to an assortment of hoodie-sporting, shaven-haired, malnourished custodial sentences waiting to happen, this is indeed nothing like one....

Time to be cruel, I think. But not predujicial; dear me no. I'll mock, malign and lacerate regardless of race, creed or colour. In truth I can't say, or more accurately don't care, from whence these search queries came in particular. They're just funny. Especially when one considers that this website, by Google's unfathomable indexing, appears somewhere as part of the results for what they were seeking in the first place. What that in fact was to begin with, in more than a few cases, remains entirely inexplicable anyway. All I *do* know is that it seems to have fuck all to do with Pink Floyd. Mostly.

And finally...what could sum up my feelings towards this entire project, which has occupied comparitively little, yet so much of my time? How can one possibly encapsulate my emotions at the conclusion of this monumental waste of effort and money? I think this poorly executed animated GIF is the perfect ending. It really does say it all

( Sadly, owing to AOL's blitzkrieg on my hosting account in late 2008 I've lost the last few frames. My piggy used to say "Fuck all that...." and drift out of the picture. Not that it makes it funny, even now.)


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